Under The Umbra Ep 06 – Collaboration Part 3 of 3 and preview of Patreon content

In this episode, we’re discussing Collaboration! This is both the final part of the conversation with Kiki, and is a…...

In this episode, we’re discussing Collaboration! This is both the final part of the conversation with Kiki, and is a teaser for some of the bonus material you can get by becoming a Patron of my show on Patreon. Link in show notes! This is an example of the extra, lightly edited, unscripted conversations.

This is part 5 of 5. The next topic is Boundaries!

The Co-Host is Kiki and you can find her work here: Instagram: @heretic.homestead   TikTok @heretichomestead


  • 0:00:00 Intro
  • 0:01:28 Introduction Chat: Preview for Patron content - ECNC in public view!
  • 0:06:17 Content Warnings
    • Content warnings for Parts 1 2 and 3 of the Collaboration episodes: To explain what it feels like to be in a non-collaborative relationship, I and my co-host describe distressing psychological experiences such as hypervigilant anxiety, ruminative and psychogenic insomnia, “barrage of rhetorical convincing,” intrusive thoughts that involve interpersonal violence, homicidal ideation, suicidal ideation, destruction of institutions; losing supportive relationships and becoming isolated
    • Content warnings for Part 3: stalking (in the intro) and systemic and litigation abuse of the stalking victim; cuckoo birds; sibling abuse; squicky bio stuff specifically illnesses caused by fecal bacteria; also, for people with sound sensitivity, my cat came to let me know that Kiki and I had talked for too long and to wrap it up, so you will hear him meowing and bumping into the microphone.
  • 0:07:32 Grounding Prayer
  • 0:08:40 Kiki's quick intro reprise
  • 0:09:12 Why Do We Care about Collaborative versus Non-Collaborative relationships and where Empathy fits in with that... Oops, that's a Stay Tuned situation!
  • 0:10:21 Kiki, my fabulous Audience Surrogate, has Reactions and Reflections! Electra has Goals!
  • 0:13:59 Kiki tells a story about Hypervigilance and how it shows up in unpredicted ways
  • 0:15:18 Back to how learning a new model can create a huge retrospective crisis. Am I now re-labeling what is normal, but able to help other situations? Or do I have a name for a challenging situation in my life right now and it explains some things.
  • 0:18:12 Kiki has a retrospective moment regarding work situations in the past; sidebar: proposition that Burnout is actually micro-moral injuries as people in power over you coerce you to violate your own morals
  • 0:20:30 How far do you revise? Is it that you're surrounded by a------s, or is non-collaboration a Norm we see at work, in relationships, on TV...
  • 0:22:12 Final Thoughts and Future Plans... and my cat says Wrap It Up!
  • 0:23:08 Outro, Credits, and Disclaimer

References mentioned in the show:

Amicus 4/22/2023 “John Roberts’ Unfunny Stalking Jokes at SCOTUS”

NPR’s Throughline 5/25/2023 “The Freedom of Speech”

This is Under the Umbra: Using Empathy and Collaboration to Navigate a World of Shadows. In each episode, Electra and the co-hosts explore ways to think about and plan for difficult relationships with people and systems in a way that stays grounded in values and centers community. I invite you to try out focusing on Empathy and Collaboration as a realistic and compassionate model for interpersonal interactions. If you find yourself Under the Umbra, let’s find our way back to the light. Find the show's home at UnderTheUmbra.Info Support the show via Patreon.com

This show is brought to you by Bridge to Becoming, LLC. Music is by SoulProdMusic on Pixabay and used with permission. Under the Umbra Podcast logo is by Lo Carter.

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